Blossoms of a memory whose roots no longer grow in me - A poem

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What did happen is long gone
But I needed some inspiration so our story is what I’ve landed on

I was chat searching for that link my boy sent me but stumbled upon our old home
Hovered over an old text and soon began to roam

Fresh into the gleam of teenage years
I warned you every-time I was going to swear and apologised after
Little chits decorated with couplets we’d sprinkle around your house
Every clue that led me to the end was a vow

It was out of a movie,
baking bread, movie night, crying over Fred
I was Kelly from Just add magic
Started like a movie, so the ending had to be tragic

I know you’d roll your eyes reading this
But I kept giving, kept nurturing your secret gardens
But they never bore fruits for me
I stood for years under that tree, shaking it hoping I could shower in your flowers
But he came around, got everything for free

We loved the same things
We’d pick a theme and decorate your bulletin
Your Instagram password is safe with me
My discord addiction is now yours to keep
I’ll keep you safe throughout exam week,
We both made up the roots, both rose like teak

Halloween is nightmare, not in the way in should be
Don’t say a word to me, because you feel like it
Stay with the people who make you feel happy IN THAT MOMENT, because that’s how you operate
Throw me around, here and there
Love may be unconditional, but there’s only so much one can tolerate

Your voice hasn’t filled my day in days
But your secret garden is still alive
For weeks I’d sit in a row of pink camellias
Wondering when you’d arrive

Tell me you’re comfortable with me
Describe to me your dream house, its interiors with musical posters all around
I went back to the secret garden but the old flowers were dead, fruits not found
Muscle memory still haunted me so I continued to sow, water, till
You left a void I thought no one could fill

My schools friends can see it on my face
That I haven’t heard from you in days
I got the last word,
You’re not worth my time no more, so I’ll move forward

If this happened a year ago, old texts would make me cry
But now I smile because I just turned that void into art
My heart will always remember you as a pleasant time, stretched out and hazy, lazily tied into a knot
For now I have poems on my notes that you would’ve like a lot 

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